Friends Season 2 Episode 19

Subtitles
​1 00:00:07,875 --> 00:00:08,967 Hey, Eddie. 2 00:00:11,211 --> 00:00:13,475 -What are you doing here? -Watching you sleep. 3 00:00:15,582 --> 00:00:16,412 Why? 4 00:00:16,784 --> 00:00:19,446 It makes me feel peaceful. 5 00:00:19,653 --> 00:00:20,483 Please. 6 00:00:21,388 --> 00:00:22,582 I can't sleep now! 7 00:00:22,790 --> 00:00:23,984 You want me to sing? 8 00:00:26,794 --> 00:00:30,093 That's it. I want you out of the apartment now! 9 00:00:30,331 --> 00:00:32,265 What are you talking about? 10 00:00:32,566 --> 00:00:33,931 Hannibal Lecter? 11 00:00:35,669 --> 00:00:37,603 Better roommate than you. 12 00:00:38,105 --> 00:00:41,939 I don't think you're being fair! One night you see me and you get scared. 13 00:00:42,176 --> 00:00:45,145 What about the other nights when you don't see me? 14 00:00:46,113 --> 00:00:48,081 Last night you went and got some water... 15 00:00:48,315 --> 00:00:50,681 ...and I was nice enough to hide behind the door. 16 00:00:52,152 --> 00:00:54,279 I didn't realize that. 17 00:00:55,489 --> 00:00:56,581 Get out now! 18 00:00:57,658 --> 00:00:59,319 You really want me out? 19 00:00:59,526 --> 00:01:00,493 Yes, please. 20 00:01:00,761 --> 00:01:03,355 Then I want to hear you say you want me out. 21 00:01:03,764 --> 00:01:04,856 I want you out. 22 00:01:05,099 --> 00:01:06,760 I want to hear it from your lips. 23 00:01:08,335 --> 00:01:09,632 Where'd you hear it before? 24 00:01:09,837 --> 00:01:12,931 All right. You know what? Consider me gone. 25 00:01:12,931 --> 00:01:17,931 I will go to my brother's basement. When he find out, I will find another man's house. 26 00:01:19,207 --> 00:01:22,438 I'll be out by the time you get home from work tomorrow. 27 00:01:23,978 --> 00:01:25,969 -Thank you. -I heard that. 28 00:01:27,949 --> 00:01:30,008 The One Where Eddie Won't Go 29 00:02:18,435 --> 00:02:20,164 Well, look at you! 30 00:02:20,470 --> 00:02:23,098 Finally got that time machine working, huh? 31 00:02:23,840 --> 00:02:24,738 You like it? 32 00:02:25,008 --> 00:02:27,772 This guy was selling them on 8th Avenue and I thought... 33 00:02:28,011 --> 00:02:29,069 ... "You know what I don't have?" 34 00:02:29,279 --> 00:02:30,746 A mirror? 35 00:02:31,981 --> 00:02:34,779 Fine, make fun. I think it's jaunty. 36 00:02:36,186 --> 00:02:39,587 For a guy who's recently lost his job, you're in a good mood. 37 00:02:39,856 --> 00:02:43,019 I'll be all right. I'm not starting from square one. 38 00:02:43,259 --> 00:02:46,854 I was Dr. Drake Ramoray on Days of our Lives. 39 00:02:47,597 --> 00:02:49,656 That's got to have some kind of cachet. 40 00:02:51,000 --> 00:02:52,797 Cachet? Jaunty? 41 00:02:53,136 --> 00:02:55,798 Chandler gave me word-of-the-day toilet paper. 42 00:02:57,841 --> 00:02:59,331 I'm gonna get some coffee. 43 00:03:02,331 --> 00:03:04,512 Go on, you know you want to. 44 00:03:16,512 --> 00:03:18,343 So? Did you read the book? 45 00:03:18,614 --> 00:03:20,707 Oh, my God. It was incredible! 46 00:03:21,016 --> 00:03:23,211 Didn't it, like, totally speak to you? 47 00:03:23,486 --> 00:03:24,544 What book is this? 48 00:03:24,787 --> 00:03:29,224 You have to read this book. It's called Be Your Own Wind Keeper. 49 00:03:29,492 --> 00:03:31,551 It's about how women need to become more empowered. 50 00:03:31,861 --> 00:03:34,386 But there's wind. 51 00:03:36,065 --> 00:03:38,829 And the wind can make us goddesses. 52 00:03:39,034 --> 00:03:42,731 Do you know who takes our wind? Men. They just take it. 53 00:03:44,507 --> 00:03:46,304 Men just take our wind? 54 00:03:46,909 --> 00:03:50,470 All the time. Because they are the lightning-bearers. 55 00:03:53,649 --> 00:03:56,482 That sounds kind of cool. It's like The Hobbit. 56 00:03:57,219 --> 00:03:59,653 It is nothing like The Hobbit. 57 00:04:00,089 --> 00:04:02,717 It's like reading about every relationship I've ever had. 58 00:04:02,925 --> 00:04:04,085 Except for Richard. 59 00:04:04,326 --> 00:04:06,886 Richard would never steal your wind. 60 00:04:08,063 --> 00:04:09,655 Because he's yummy. 61 00:04:10,766 --> 00:04:11,858 But all the others. 62 00:04:12,467 --> 00:04:15,300 And the part about how they're always drinking... 63 00:04:15,570 --> 00:04:17,401 ...from our pool of inner power. 64 00:04:17,673 --> 00:04:19,903 But God forbid we should take a sip. 65 00:04:19,908 --> 00:04:21,535 Anybody want a cruller? 66 00:04:21,544 --> 00:04:23,842 This is a typical lightning-bearer thing. 67 00:04:24,280 --> 00:04:25,247 It's like... 68 00:04:26,015 --> 00:04:29,610 ... "Hello. Who wants one of my phallic-shaped man-cakes?" 69 00:04:46,293 --> 00:04:49,353 Don't worry about it, already! Things happen. 70 00:04:51,632 --> 00:04:54,795 You're not mad at me for getting fired and everything? 71 00:04:55,602 --> 00:04:56,933 Look at me. 72 00:04:57,438 --> 00:04:58,928 Look at me! 73 00:05:00,774 --> 00:05:03,208 Do I have lipstick on my teeth? 74 00:05:07,414 --> 00:05:08,608 Can we get back to me? 75 00:05:08,816 --> 00:05:13,048 Look, honey. People get fired left and right in this business. 76 00:05:13,287 --> 00:05:16,085 I already got you an audition for Another World. 77 00:05:16,590 --> 00:05:17,818 All right! 78 00:05:18,792 --> 00:05:20,419 "Cab Driver Number 2"? 79 00:05:20,961 --> 00:05:22,292 You're welcome. 80 00:05:24,498 --> 00:05:26,432 But I was Dr. Drake Ramoray! 81 00:05:26,834 --> 00:05:30,133 How can I go from being a neurosurgeon to driving a cab? 82 00:05:37,604 --> 00:05:40,801 Things change. Roll with them. 83 00:05:41,108 --> 00:05:43,269 But this is a two-line part! 84 00:05:43,510 --> 00:05:45,637 It's like taking a step backwards. 85 00:05:45,846 --> 00:05:47,746 I'm not gonna do this. 86 00:05:50,984 --> 00:05:53,976 I'm gonna tell you the same thing I told Al Minza... 87 00:05:54,187 --> 00:05:56,314 ...and his pyramid of dogs. 88 00:05:57,657 --> 00:06:01,093 Take any job you can get, and don't make on the floor. 89 00:06:02,996 --> 00:06:04,657 I'm sorry. 90 00:06:05,265 --> 00:06:06,459 I'll see you. 91 00:06:09,002 --> 00:06:10,094 God! 92 00:06:10,604 --> 00:06:12,697 Oh, God! I mean, it's just so.... 93 00:06:12,973 --> 00:06:14,133 Isn't it? 94 00:06:15,041 --> 00:06:17,475 This is like reading about my own life! 95 00:06:17,711 --> 00:06:21,477 This book could have been called Be Your Own Wind Keeper, Rachel! 96 00:06:22,449 --> 00:06:24,349 It wouldn't have sold a million copies... 97 00:06:24,551 --> 00:06:26,712 ...but it would've made a nice gift for you. 98 00:06:29,456 --> 00:06:31,549 Sweetie, we've got to go. 99 00:06:36,163 --> 00:06:40,998 No! Why do we always have to do everything according to your timetable? 100 00:06:41,201 --> 00:06:44,466 Actually, it's the movie theater that has the timetable. 101 00:06:45,238 --> 00:06:47,399 It's so you don't miss the beginning. 102 00:06:48,675 --> 00:06:53,612 This isn't about the movie theater. This is about you stealing my wind. 103 00:06:55,715 --> 00:06:57,239 You go, girl! 104 00:07:00,187 --> 00:07:02,382 I can't pull that off, can l? 105 00:07:04,191 --> 00:07:07,092 Excuse me, your wind? 106 00:07:07,327 --> 00:07:08,851 Yes, my wind. 107 00:07:09,062 --> 00:07:12,589 How do you expect me to grow if you won't let me blow? 108 00:07:19,105 --> 00:07:21,164 You know I don't... 109 00:07:23,743 --> 00:07:25,938 ... have a problem with that. 110 00:07:36,856 --> 00:07:40,622 I just really need to be with myself right now. 111 00:07:42,028 --> 00:07:42,858 I'm sorry. 112 00:07:44,097 --> 00:07:46,930 You're right. I don't have to apologize. 113 00:07:47,901 --> 00:07:49,425 Sorry. Damn it! 114 00:07:56,142 --> 00:07:57,700 -What is it? -I don't know. 115 00:07:57,944 --> 00:08:00,640 It's got all this stuff about wind and trees... 116 00:08:00,914 --> 00:08:02,541 ...and some sacred pool. 117 00:08:02,749 --> 00:08:05,912 I don't really get it. But she's pretty upset about it. 118 00:08:06,152 --> 00:08:08,950 This is why I don't date women who read. 119 00:08:11,925 --> 00:08:13,256 What's that? 120 00:08:14,060 --> 00:08:15,584 It's my VlSA bill. 121 00:08:15,829 --> 00:08:18,127 Envelope one of two. 122 00:08:20,267 --> 00:08:22,963 -That can't be good. -Open it, open it. 123 00:08:26,273 --> 00:08:27,103 Oh, my God! 124 00:08:28,475 --> 00:08:31,740 Look at this! How did I spend so much money? 125 00:08:32,078 --> 00:08:34,842 That's just the minimum amount. That's your total. 126 00:08:37,484 --> 00:08:41,443 Thirty-five hundred dollars at "Porcelain Safari"? 127 00:08:41,688 --> 00:08:43,087 My animals. 128 00:08:44,291 --> 00:08:48,318 The guy said they suited me. He spoke with an accent. I was confused. 129 00:08:49,596 --> 00:08:50,927 I don't know what to do! 130 00:08:51,164 --> 00:08:54,099 You can start by driving a cab on Another World. 131 00:08:54,367 --> 00:08:56,028 -What? -That audition? 132 00:08:56,303 --> 00:08:57,930 That's a two-line part! 133 00:08:58,305 --> 00:09:02,264 Joey, you owe $1100 at "I Love Lucite." 134 00:09:02,676 --> 00:09:04,837 -So what? -So suck it up, man. 135 00:09:05,111 --> 00:09:06,703 It's a job. It's money. 136 00:09:07,013 --> 00:09:10,676 I don't need you getting judgmental and condescending and pedantic. 137 00:09:11,851 --> 00:09:13,182 Toilet paper? 138 00:09:16,289 --> 00:09:19,053 I'm not being any of those things. I'm being realistic. 139 00:09:19,326 --> 00:09:21,123 You're supposed to be my friend! 140 00:09:21,361 --> 00:09:22,191 I am your friend. 141 00:09:22,462 --> 00:09:24,487 Then tell me things like, "You'll be fine." 142 00:09:24,731 --> 00:09:27,859 And "Something big's gonna come along. I know it!" 143 00:09:28,068 --> 00:09:29,399 But I don't know it. 144 00:09:29,636 --> 00:09:33,163 What I do know is you owe $2300 at "lsn't It Chromantic?" 145 00:09:34,674 --> 00:09:36,403 I'm aware of what I owe. 146 00:09:36,676 --> 00:09:40,510 Then get some sense. It took you 10 years to get that job. 147 00:09:40,714 --> 00:09:43,547 -How long till you get another? -I don't want to hear this! 148 00:09:43,750 --> 00:09:44,842 I'm just saying.... 149 00:09:45,051 --> 00:09:47,178 Well, don't "just say"! 150 00:09:49,656 --> 00:09:51,021 Maybe I should just go. 151 00:09:54,060 --> 00:09:55,584 I'll see you later. 152 00:09:57,030 --> 00:09:58,520 Just think about it. 153 00:09:58,765 --> 00:10:00,596 I don't need to think about it! 154 00:10:00,900 --> 00:10:03,061 I was Dr. Drake Ramoray! 155 00:10:03,336 --> 00:10:05,099 That was huge! 156 00:10:05,405 --> 00:10:07,839 Big things are gonna happen! You'll see! 157 00:10:08,041 --> 00:10:09,099 Ross! 158 00:10:09,709 --> 00:10:11,176 You still there? 159 00:10:38,693 --> 00:10:39,955 What are you still doing here? 160 00:10:40,261 --> 00:10:43,059 Just some basic dehydrating of fruits and vegetables. 161 00:10:43,297 --> 00:10:45,857 Man alive, this thing's fantastic! 162 00:10:47,235 --> 00:10:48,930 Aren't you forgetting anything? 163 00:10:49,270 --> 00:10:51,431 Oh, yeah. I got us a new goldfish. 164 00:10:51,706 --> 00:10:53,401 He's feistier than the last one. 165 00:10:53,775 --> 00:10:56,710 Maybe because the last one was made by Pepperidge Farm. 166 00:10:58,212 --> 00:11:01,909 Eddie, isn't there something you're supposed to be doing now? 167 00:11:02,150 --> 00:11:04,550 Not unless it's got something to do with dehydrating. 168 00:11:04,786 --> 00:11:07,619 Because right now, I'm a dehydrating maniac! 169 00:11:10,591 --> 00:11:13,822 I thought we had a deal. I thought by the time I got 170 00:11:14,061 --> 00:11:15,221 You know what that is? 171 00:11:15,963 --> 00:11:17,760 Your last roommate's kidney? 172 00:11:19,133 --> 00:11:20,896 That's a tomato. 173 00:11:21,169 --> 00:11:24,229 This one definitely goes in the display. 174 00:11:33,014 --> 00:11:35,949 Hey, Gunther. Let me get a lemonade to go. 175 00:11:36,417 --> 00:11:37,349 Lemonade? 176 00:11:37,819 --> 00:11:39,252 You okay, man? 177 00:11:40,188 --> 00:11:41,780 It's career stuff. 178 00:11:42,023 --> 00:11:44,617 They killed off my character on the show. 179 00:11:45,092 --> 00:11:47,583 That's too bad. How'd they do it? 180 00:11:47,829 --> 00:11:50,024 I fell down an elevator shaft. 181 00:11:50,998 --> 00:11:52,022 That sucks. 182 00:11:52,333 --> 00:11:53,925 I was buried in an avalanche. 183 00:11:55,703 --> 00:11:56,635 What? 184 00:11:56,838 --> 00:11:59,306 I used to be Brice on All My Children. 185 00:12:21,362 --> 00:12:22,886 Why must everybody watch me sleep? 186 00:12:23,564 --> 00:12:25,794 There'll be no more watching me sleep! No more... 187 00:12:26,000 --> 00:12:27,024 ...watching! 188 00:12:38,840 --> 00:12:42,173 I got some great stuff to dehydrate. Grapes, apricots. 189 00:12:42,377 --> 00:12:46,143 I thought it'd be cool to see what happens with these water balloons. 190 00:12:46,481 --> 00:12:49,382 Get out. Get out, get out, get out! 191 00:12:51,086 --> 00:12:52,713 -What? -You! Move out! 192 00:12:52,988 --> 00:12:56,981 Take your fruit! Your stupid small fruit and get out! 193 00:12:57,225 --> 00:12:59,159 You want me to move out? 194 00:13:07,736 --> 00:13:12,070 I gotta tell you, that's kind of out of the blue, don't you think? 195 00:13:13,575 --> 00:13:15,042 This is not out of the blue! 196 00:13:15,343 --> 00:13:17,436 This is smack-dab in the middle of the blue! 197 00:13:19,948 --> 00:13:21,916 Relax! Take it easy, buddy! 198 00:13:22,183 --> 00:13:23,741 You don't have to tell me twice. 199 00:13:25,687 --> 00:13:27,552 Someone will be by for my stuff. 200 00:13:32,561 --> 00:13:36,019 If you think I'm leaving you alone with my fish, you're insane! 201 00:13:37,299 --> 00:13:38,288 You want some help? 202 00:13:38,533 --> 00:13:40,433 No help required, chico! 203 00:13:54,044 --> 00:13:57,377 All the way to the airport, huh? You know, that's over 30 miles. 204 00:13:57,647 --> 00:14:00,878 That's gonna cost you about so bucks. 205 00:14:01,151 --> 00:14:03,381 Excuse me, that's fifty bucks. 206 00:14:05,322 --> 00:14:07,483 Five-O dollars. 207 00:14:08,592 --> 00:14:12,426 You know what it is? It's smudgy because they're fax pages. 208 00:14:12,629 --> 00:14:15,564 When I was on Days of our Lives as Dr. Drake Ramoray... 209 00:14:16,633 --> 00:14:19,727 ...they'd send over the whole script on real paper. 210 00:14:20,270 --> 00:14:22,067 That's great. 211 00:14:22,305 --> 00:14:26,332 If you wanted to expand this scene, like have the cab crash... 212 00:14:26,576 --> 00:14:28,441 ... I could attend to the victims... 213 00:14:28,645 --> 00:14:31,239 ... because I have a background in medical acting. 214 00:14:32,315 --> 00:14:34,840 Okay, listen, thanks for coming in. 215 00:14:35,085 --> 00:14:38,350 Don't thank me for coming in. At least let me finish. 216 00:14:42,626 --> 00:14:44,856 We could take the expressway... 217 00:14:45,095 --> 00:14:48,326 ... but this time of day you're better off taking the budge. 218 00:14:51,034 --> 00:14:53,730 You were going for bridge there, weren't you? 219 00:14:54,971 --> 00:14:56,700 I'll have a good day. 220 00:15:00,700 --> 00:15:02,700 Honey, I know you didn't mean to. 221 00:15:04,700 --> 00:15:08,700 Rach, hang up. You are suppose to be taking goddness quiz. 222 00:15:08,700 --> 00:15:11,700 You should lose 100 point just because of you call your boyfriend in the middle of it. 223 00:15:17,745 --> 00:15:19,007 Question number 28. 224 00:15:19,246 --> 00:15:23,182 "Have you ever allowed a lightning-bearer to take your wind?" 225 00:15:23,984 --> 00:15:25,679 I would have to say no. 226 00:15:28,155 --> 00:15:29,918 And I would have to say.... 227 00:15:31,092 --> 00:15:31,922 What? 228 00:15:32,226 --> 00:15:33,921 Do you not remember the puppet guy? 229 00:15:34,161 --> 00:15:39,098 You totally let him wash his feet in the pool of your inner power. 230 00:15:40,668 --> 00:15:42,363 And his puppet too! 231 00:15:42,670 --> 00:15:44,763 Well, at least I didn't let some guy... 232 00:15:45,039 --> 00:15:47,906 ...into the forest of my righteous truth on the first date! 233 00:15:52,279 --> 00:15:53,678 -Who? -Paul! 234 00:15:56,250 --> 00:15:58,582 Moving on, moving on. Next question. 235 00:15:59,186 --> 00:16:00,585 Okay, number 29. 236 00:16:00,854 --> 00:16:03,755 "Have you ever betrayed another goddess... 237 00:16:04,024 --> 00:16:06,891 ...for a lightning-bearer?" Okay, number 30. 238 00:16:07,161 --> 00:16:10,028 Whoa, whoa, whoa! Let's go back to 29. 239 00:16:14,168 --> 00:16:15,999 Not to my recollection. 240 00:16:17,771 --> 00:16:19,830 Danny Arshack, ninth grade. 241 00:16:20,074 --> 00:16:22,508 You know the bottle was pointing at me. 242 00:16:22,743 --> 00:16:25,507 Only because you took up half the circle! 243 00:16:29,383 --> 00:16:32,352 Listen to you two. It's so sad. 244 00:16:33,454 --> 00:16:36,446 Looks like I'll be going to the goddess meetings alone. 245 00:16:38,058 --> 00:16:40,356 Not when they find out you slept with Jason Hurley... 246 00:16:40,594 --> 00:16:43,392 ...an hour after he broke up with Monica. 247 00:16:45,032 --> 00:16:46,294 One hour? 248 00:16:46,567 --> 00:16:48,728 You are such a leaf blower! 249 00:16:56,728 --> 00:17:00,728 -That is not on the book. -No, but that's what you are. 250 00:17:13,218 --> 00:17:17,712 Be careful with that 3-D Last Supper. Judas is a little loose. 251 00:17:22,594 --> 00:17:24,494 Oh, my God! What's going on? 252 00:17:25,497 --> 00:17:28,933 They're taking all my stuff back. I guess you were right. 253 00:17:29,134 --> 00:17:32,297 No, I wasn't right. That's what I came here to tell you. 254 00:17:33,404 --> 00:17:36,931 I was totally hung up on my own stuff the other day. 255 00:17:37,142 --> 00:17:40,942 No, listen. I need the whole security thing, you know? 256 00:17:41,146 --> 00:17:45,446 To know where my next paycheck is coming from. But you don't need that. 257 00:17:45,817 --> 00:17:47,341 And that's amazing to me. 258 00:17:47,619 --> 00:17:49,951 I could never do what you do. 259 00:17:50,922 --> 00:17:53,584 -Thanks. -You hold out for something bigger. 260 00:17:53,792 --> 00:17:55,919 I can't tell you how much respect I have... 261 00:17:56,127 --> 00:17:58,823 ...for you not going to that stupid audition. 262 00:17:59,164 --> 00:18:00,927 -I went. -Great! How did it go? 263 00:18:01,599 --> 00:18:03,362 -I didn't get it. -Good for you! 264 00:18:03,635 --> 00:18:04,863 You're living the dream! 265 00:18:06,671 --> 00:18:08,434 All right, then! 266 00:18:09,674 --> 00:18:11,642 Not my parrot. 267 00:18:12,477 --> 00:18:14,638 I can't watch this. 268 00:18:15,713 --> 00:18:17,340 Hey, hold on, hold on. 269 00:18:18,216 --> 00:18:21,652 How much for the.... How much to save the bird? 270 00:18:22,187 --> 00:18:23,677 -Twelve hundred. -Dollars? 271 00:18:24,155 --> 00:18:26,623 You spent $1200 on a plastic bird? 272 00:18:27,225 --> 00:18:29,785 It was an impulse buy. Near the register. 273 00:18:30,328 --> 00:18:32,694 Go ahead with the bird. 274 00:18:32,997 --> 00:18:36,228 Do you have anything for around $200? 275 00:18:37,802 --> 00:18:39,064 The dog. 276 00:18:43,341 --> 00:18:44,501 I'll take it. 277 00:18:44,709 --> 00:18:46,404 My gift to you, man. 278 00:18:48,913 --> 00:18:50,073 Thanks, Ross! 279 00:18:50,315 --> 00:18:52,374 I really liked that bird, though. 280 00:18:53,017 --> 00:18:54,678 But the dog! 281 00:19:04,095 --> 00:19:05,426 Here are your cakes. 282 00:19:05,697 --> 00:19:06,994 We didn't order cake. 283 00:19:07,599 --> 00:19:10,261 No, I know. They're from me. 284 00:19:11,169 --> 00:19:12,830 You guys, this is not good. 285 00:19:13,037 --> 00:19:15,562 We have enough trouble with guys stealing our wind... 286 00:19:15,773 --> 00:19:17,832 ...without taking it from each other. 287 00:19:18,576 --> 00:19:19,873 You're right. 288 00:19:20,778 --> 00:19:22,336 I love you goddesses. 289 00:19:25,183 --> 00:19:27,845 I don't ever want to suck your wind again. 290 00:19:28,686 --> 00:19:31,120 -Thank you. So are we good? -We're good. 291 00:19:31,356 --> 00:19:33,051 We're good? 292 00:19:33,258 --> 00:19:36,125 Let me take these back. They'll take it out of my paycheck. 293 00:19:39,364 --> 00:19:41,389 Ding-dong, the psycho's gone! 294 00:19:46,037 --> 00:19:47,595 Are you sure this time? 295 00:19:47,872 --> 00:19:49,772 I actually saw him leave. 296 00:19:50,041 --> 00:19:52,407 That guy is holding a human head. 297 00:19:52,911 --> 00:19:55,209 He's holding a human head! 298 00:19:57,749 --> 00:19:58,773 Check it out, man! 299 00:19:58,983 --> 00:20:01,952 I tore it off a mannequin in the alley behind Macy's. 300 00:20:02,220 --> 00:20:03,278 There's no alley behind Macy's. 301 00:20:03,554 --> 00:20:06,284 So I got it in the junior miss department. Big diff. 302 00:20:06,557 --> 00:20:10,152 It'll make a hell of a conversation piece at our next cocktail party. 303 00:20:10,428 --> 00:20:12,726 "Our next cocktail party"? 304 00:20:13,898 --> 00:20:16,731 We'll put chips in it. We'll make it a chip chick. 305 00:20:19,971 --> 00:20:22,064 Do you remember yesterday? 306 00:20:22,307 --> 00:20:24,400 Yes, I think I vaguely recall it. 307 00:20:29,480 --> 00:20:32,608 Do you remember talking to me yesterday? 308 00:20:39,257 --> 00:20:40,349 So what happened? 309 00:20:40,591 --> 00:20:42,525 We took a road trip to Las Vegas! 310 00:20:42,760 --> 00:20:44,660 Oh, sweet Moses! 311 00:20:46,264 --> 00:20:48,824 So on this road trip, did you win any money? 312 00:20:49,100 --> 00:20:52,297 I crapped out. But Mr. 21 here! He cleans up! 313 00:20:52,503 --> 00:20:54,801 $300! He buys me these new shoes. 314 00:20:55,340 --> 00:20:56,466 Nice. 315 00:20:56,708 --> 00:20:58,767 See you upstairs. See you, pals! 316 00:21:02,714 --> 00:21:05,877 Is anyone else starting to really like him? 317 00:21:25,636 --> 00:21:26,534 May I help you? 318 00:21:28,306 --> 00:21:31,036 Why doesn't my key work, and what's my stuff doing downstairs? 319 00:21:31,576 --> 00:21:33,134 I'm sorry. 320 00:21:34,712 --> 00:21:36,009 Have we met? 321 00:21:36,247 --> 00:21:38,545 It's Eddie, you freak! Your roommate. 322 00:21:39,550 --> 00:21:41,074 I'm sorry... 323 00:21:41,886 --> 00:21:44,081 ... I already have a roommate. 324 00:21:51,229 --> 00:21:55,666 He's lived here for years. I don't know what you're talking about. 325 00:21:58,403 --> 00:22:01,930 No, he moved out and I moved in. 326 00:22:03,374 --> 00:22:06,707 Well, I think we'd remember something like that. 327 00:22:07,011 --> 00:22:08,603 I know I would. 328 00:22:10,114 --> 00:22:12,105 That's a good point. 329 00:22:12,683 --> 00:22:13,741 Okay, wow. 330 00:22:13,951 --> 00:22:16,215 I guess I got the wrong apartment. 331 00:22:19,390 --> 00:22:21,688 -I'm terribly sorry. -Hey, no problem. 332 00:22:21,926 --> 00:22:23,086 See you. 333 00:22:29,434 --> 00:22:32,926 Goodbye, you fruit-drying psychopath. 334 00:22:34,439 --> 00:22:37,636 -You want me to help you unpack? -Nah, I'm okay. 335 00:22:38,543 --> 00:22:42,206 Just so you know, I'm not moving back in because I have to. 336 00:22:42,447 --> 00:22:45,143 I mean, I do have to, but.... 337 00:22:45,416 --> 00:22:48,544 It's just that that place, it wasn't really.... 338 00:22:48,753 --> 00:22:50,550 I mean, this is.... 339 00:22:51,889 --> 00:22:53,413 Welcome home, man. 340 00:23:02,900 --> 00:23:05,391 -A little foos? -Absolutely! 341 00:23:07,972 --> 00:23:09,769 What happened to the foosball? 342 00:23:10,508 --> 00:23:11,907 It's a cantaloupe. 343 00:23:16,948 --> 00:23:19,781 Are we gonna bring this out every time Ross comes over? 344 00:23:20,017 --> 00:23:22,178 He paid a lot of money for it. 345 00:23:28,326 --> 00:23:30,521 I'm gonna hold him a different way. 346 00:23:31,863 --> 00:23:35,424 If you hated it so much, why'd you buy it in the first place? 347 00:23:35,666 --> 00:23:39,432 Well, I had a whole ceramic zoo thing going over there. 348 00:23:39,670 --> 00:23:42,195 But without the other ones, it looks tacky. 349 00:23:48,174 --> 00:23:51,666 Is he housetrained or will he leave little bathroom tiles all over? 350 00:23:52,678 --> 00:23:53,667 Stay. 351 00:23:55,548 --> 00:23:56,537 Stay! 352 00:23:57,016 --> 00:23:58,881 Good fake dog.