How I Met Your Mother Season 1 Episode 22

Subtitles
1 00:00:13,666 --> 00:00:16,596 It was May of 2006 in New York City 2 00:00:16,597 --> 00:00:18,119 and life was good. 3 00:00:18,130 --> 00:00:20,334 But everything was about to change. 4 00:00:21,126 --> 00:00:24,349 So... what do you think? 5 00:00:25,261 --> 00:00:27,457 Robin again? 6 00:00:27,458 --> 00:00:33,085 Ted, the universe clearly does not want you and Robin to be together. 7 00:00:33,086 --> 00:00:36,250 Don't piss off the universe. The universe will slap you. 8 00:00:36,251 --> 00:00:39,611 But don't you think the universe has more important things to worry about than my dating life? 9 00:00:39,612 --> 00:00:45,295 Unless your dating life is the glue holding the entire universe together... Whoa. Chills. 10 00:00:45,315 --> 00:00:47,551 Anybody else get chills? 11 00:00:48,200 --> 00:00:51,460 Look, I realize we've been down this road before, 12 00:00:51,460 --> 00:00:54,063 but the fact is, whatever I do, 13 00:00:54,063 --> 00:00:56,927 it all keeps coming back to Robin, so... 14 00:00:57,166 --> 00:00:58,703 I gotta do this. 15 00:01:00,015 --> 00:01:01,840 Ow! What the hell? 16 00:01:01,848 --> 00:01:04,321 That wasn't me. That was the universe. 17 00:01:05,658 --> 00:01:10,000 The funny thing was, at that very moment, the universe was working on something-- 18 00:01:10,006 --> 00:01:11,401 a storm. 19 00:01:11,405 --> 00:01:15,442 And so tropical storm Willy is going to be with us at least until Monday. 20 00:01:15,447 --> 00:01:18,171 It's gonna rain cats and dogs, folks. 21 00:01:18,187 --> 00:01:20,150 So don't step in a poodle. 22 00:01:20,156 --> 00:01:21,583 Sandy? Robin? 23 00:01:21,585 --> 00:01:22,750 Thanks, Lou. 24 00:01:22,756 --> 00:01:26,851 Boy, too bad. Our big Metro News One camping trip was going to be this weekend. 25 00:01:26,856 --> 00:01:30,000 Yeah, but camping out in the rain? No fun. Muddy. Yuck. 26 00:01:30,006 --> 00:01:31,651 Guess we'll have to take a rain check. 27 00:01:31,655 --> 00:01:33,872 And we'll check in with you tomorrow, New York. 28 00:01:33,876 --> 00:01:35,380 Have a great night. 29 00:01:35,725 --> 00:01:37,300 And, we're clear. 30 00:01:37,307 --> 00:01:41,480 Bummer. I was hoping to finally have sex with you this weekend, Scherbotsky. 31 00:01:41,486 --> 00:01:44,533 Well, I'd give you the "I don't date coworkers" speech again, 32 00:01:44,535 --> 00:01:47,523 but, God, you must have that sum'bitch memorized by now. 33 00:01:47,527 --> 00:01:50,683 Shame, though. It was a pretty hot show tonight. 34 00:01:50,686 --> 00:01:53,770 The rhythmic give and take of our improvised banter there at the end 35 00:01:53,775 --> 00:01:56,051 really got my freak juice flowing. 36 00:01:57,206 --> 00:02:00,161 Dude, he's right. How many times do you have to watch this crash 37 00:02:00,166 --> 00:02:02,091 and burn before you say, "enough"? 38 00:02:02,097 --> 00:02:04,110 One more. One more time. 39 00:02:04,117 --> 00:02:06,582 One more big, beautiful, stupid romantic gesture. 40 00:02:06,598 --> 00:02:09,382 And then, whatever she says, yes or no, that's it. 41 00:02:09,386 --> 00:02:10,793 If it's yes, great. 42 00:02:10,796 --> 00:02:14,131 If it's no, then I am done going after Robin forever. 43 00:02:14,137 --> 00:02:17,630 So what's this big, beautiful romantic gesture? 44 00:02:17,635 --> 00:02:19,873 I am going to make her... 45 00:02:20,707 --> 00:02:22,621 a mix CD. 46 00:02:23,776 --> 00:02:25,340 No, I'm kidding. I got a plan. 47 00:02:25,348 --> 00:02:27,262 Lily, I'm going to need the spare key to Robin's apartment. 48 00:02:27,266 --> 00:02:28,892 I see where this is going. 49 00:02:28,898 --> 00:02:33,710 Ted, waiting naked in a girl's bed wearing whipped cream undies does not work... 50 00:02:33,885 --> 00:02:35,082 usually. 51 00:02:35,085 --> 00:02:37,220 The setting-- Martha's Vineyard, 1999. 52 00:02:37,227 --> 00:02:40,953 The characters: Yours truly and a raven-haired au pair by the name... 53 00:02:41,417 --> 00:02:42,771 Universe. 54 00:02:43,288 --> 00:02:45,990 So, this plan you speak of? 55 00:02:45,996 --> 00:02:48,792 Remember the first night Robin and I went out? 56 00:02:48,797 --> 00:02:52,470 I stole a blue French horn for her and it almost worked. 57 00:02:52,478 --> 00:02:54,971 Yeah. Dude, that was awesome, 58 00:02:54,988 --> 00:02:57,261 but how are you ever going to top that? 59 00:03:02,878 --> 00:03:04,753 She should be here any second. 60 00:03:05,155 --> 00:03:08,411 Uh, we're pretty hungry. When do we get our pizza? 61 00:03:08,417 --> 00:03:11,703 Enough with the-- we'll go get pizza later, all right? 62 00:03:11,708 --> 00:03:13,141 Just... 63 00:03:25,518 --> 00:03:26,852 Damn it. 64 00:03:32,997 --> 00:03:33,850 Hello. 65 00:03:33,857 --> 00:03:38,242 Hey, Lily, I'm locked out of my apartment. I need to come pick up my extra key. 66 00:03:38,408 --> 00:03:40,121 Extra key? 67 00:03:41,306 --> 00:03:43,351 Do I have an extra key to your apartment? 68 00:03:43,355 --> 00:03:44,733 Yes, I gave it to you. 69 00:03:44,735 --> 00:03:46,641 Oh, right. That key. 70 00:03:46,646 --> 00:03:48,252 Yeah, I lost it. 71 00:03:48,528 --> 00:03:50,520 Great, now I gotta go to the locksmith. 72 00:03:50,526 --> 00:03:52,621 No, wait, uh... 73 00:03:52,745 --> 00:03:54,682 Maybe you should just knock. 74 00:03:54,686 --> 00:03:56,081 Knock? 75 00:03:56,097 --> 00:03:58,641 Lily, my dogs aren't that well trained. 76 00:04:03,806 --> 00:04:08,683 Hello, Lily, this is Janet Kagan at the Russell House Art Foundation here in San Francisco. 77 00:04:08,686 --> 00:04:12,531 I'm pleased to inform you that we've accepted your application for our summer fellowship. 78 00:04:12,537 --> 00:04:14,691 We look forward to hearing from you. Bye-bye. 79 00:04:14,706 --> 00:04:18,182 Uh, Robin, I-I gotta go. Just knock, okay? 80 00:04:19,928 --> 00:04:21,831 Summer fellowship? 81 00:04:22,178 --> 00:04:23,581 Just knock. 82 00:04:23,598 --> 00:04:24,983 Okay. 83 00:04:31,246 --> 00:04:32,101 Hi. 84 00:04:33,116 --> 00:04:34,310 Hi. 85 00:04:44,367 --> 00:04:45,563 Robin... 86 00:04:46,457 --> 00:04:47,982 I've sort of said this already. 87 00:04:47,985 --> 00:04:51,962 I mean I've half said it. I've tried to say it, and I've said it badly. 88 00:04:52,056 --> 00:04:54,992 So this is me, just saying it. 89 00:04:55,228 --> 00:04:56,972 With strings. 90 00:04:58,018 --> 00:05:01,552 I'm crazy about you. I think we should be together. 91 00:05:01,958 --> 00:05:03,532 What do you say? 92 00:05:12,807 --> 00:05:14,651 - What do you say? - Yes. 93 00:05:14,655 --> 00:05:15,881 No. 94 00:05:16,095 --> 00:05:17,461 I don't know. 95 00:05:17,515 --> 00:05:19,143 Those are the three options. 96 00:05:19,145 --> 00:05:21,212 - Ted, this is so... - I know. 97 00:05:21,216 --> 00:05:26,912 I mean, I come home, I was going to watch Jeopardy and there's a string quartet and... 98 00:05:27,077 --> 00:05:28,832 I have to pee. 99 00:05:29,505 --> 00:05:31,050 Oh, I'm sorry. 100 00:05:31,508 --> 00:05:34,290 Uh, well, go ahead. We'll, uh, we'll wait. 101 00:05:46,406 --> 00:05:49,933 Yeah, 'cause when we talked earlier, you said there'd be pizza. 102 00:05:49,936 --> 00:05:53,740 No, I said I'd get you a pizza afterwards. 103 00:05:53,745 --> 00:05:57,781 Look, could we talk about this later? I'm sort of professing my love here. 104 00:05:57,795 --> 00:05:59,112 Sure. 105 00:06:00,606 --> 00:06:02,281 We're not getting any pizza. 106 00:06:04,695 --> 00:06:07,881 Okay. Let's talk. 107 00:06:07,885 --> 00:06:09,222 Okay. 108 00:06:12,096 --> 00:06:14,611 Oh, hey, you guys want to take five? 109 00:06:15,957 --> 00:06:17,791 Thanks, guys. Just need a minute. 110 00:06:17,795 --> 00:06:21,140 Sort of a big life decision. Love the blue instruments, though. 111 00:06:21,148 --> 00:06:22,872 Kind of an inside joke. 112 00:06:23,076 --> 00:06:24,220 Thanks. 113 00:06:26,295 --> 00:06:29,182 - You're crazy. - Right. Come on. 114 00:06:29,187 --> 00:06:31,643 It's not that I haven't thought about this. 115 00:06:31,645 --> 00:06:33,991 You know that I have, but let's look at this, okay? 116 00:06:33,996 --> 00:06:36,201 We only just started being friends again. 117 00:06:36,206 --> 00:06:39,001 I know. But-- come on. 118 00:06:39,007 --> 00:06:40,691 And we want different things. 119 00:06:40,696 --> 00:06:43,071 That's still there. That's not going away. 120 00:06:43,075 --> 00:06:45,322 I mean, what if we do this and it doesn't work out 121 00:06:45,328 --> 00:06:47,560 and I'd lose you as a friend? 122 00:06:47,567 --> 00:06:49,291 I gotta think about this. 123 00:06:49,296 --> 00:06:51,701 Okay, fine. Think about it on the plane. 124 00:06:51,707 --> 00:06:53,783 Let's go to Paris for the weekend. I'm serious. 125 00:06:53,796 --> 00:06:55,282 I'm kidding. I'm serious. 126 00:06:55,297 --> 00:06:57,732 I can't go to Paris, I'm going camping. 127 00:06:57,738 --> 00:06:59,060 I thought that thing was canceled. 128 00:06:59,066 --> 00:07:00,110 Well, it's back on. 129 00:07:00,118 --> 00:07:01,022 Since when? 130 00:07:01,028 --> 00:07:02,842 Since like an hour ago. 131 00:07:02,847 --> 00:07:06,441 ..sending the storm back out into the Atlantic. 132 00:07:06,456 --> 00:07:09,670 So it's blue skies this weekend. 133 00:07:09,677 --> 00:07:11,092 Sandy? Robin? 134 00:07:11,097 --> 00:07:16,500 Thanks, Lou, but that blue sky isn't without at least one cloud. 135 00:07:16,515 --> 00:07:21,261 I'm sorry to announce that one week from today I will be leaving Metro News One. 136 00:07:21,346 --> 00:07:23,750 It has been an honor to bring you the news each night, 137 00:07:23,756 --> 00:07:26,332 and read the paper to you each morning. 138 00:07:26,596 --> 00:07:28,432 I will always treasure it. 139 00:07:28,448 --> 00:07:30,043 Good night, New York. 140 00:07:30,218 --> 00:07:31,871 And we're clear. 141 00:07:32,067 --> 00:07:33,270 You're leaving? 142 00:07:33,276 --> 00:07:35,622 There. I quit my job. 143 00:07:35,628 --> 00:07:39,192 We're not coworkers. Will you please have dinner with me? 144 00:07:39,910 --> 00:07:42,360 I'm joking. I got offered a job at CNN. 145 00:07:42,360 --> 00:07:43,973 Oh, congratulations. 146 00:07:43,973 --> 00:07:45,956 Congratulations yourself. 147 00:07:45,956 --> 00:07:46,952 What do you mean? 148 00:07:46,958 --> 00:07:51,410 Well, Joel asked me who I thought should replace me as lead anchor. 149 00:07:51,415 --> 00:07:53,222 I told him you. 150 00:07:53,887 --> 00:07:56,661 They're announcing it next week. Act surprised. 151 00:07:56,666 --> 00:07:58,240 Wow. 152 00:07:58,625 --> 00:08:00,170 Thanks. 153 00:08:01,415 --> 00:08:02,611 And, yes. 154 00:08:02,618 --> 00:08:03,812 Yes, what? 155 00:08:03,817 --> 00:08:05,781 Yes, let's go get dinner. 156 00:08:06,765 --> 00:08:09,373 How about this weekend on the camping trip? 157 00:08:09,435 --> 00:08:11,500 I roast a mean weenie. 158 00:08:13,277 --> 00:08:15,222 Oh, you're kidding me. 159 00:08:15,227 --> 00:08:17,142 No way. Don't go on this thing. 160 00:08:17,145 --> 00:08:19,830 Ted, I have to go. It's a company camping trip. 161 00:08:19,838 --> 00:08:22,491 Really? Because it also kinda sounds like a date. 162 00:08:22,498 --> 00:08:25,192 With Sandy... and his weenie. 163 00:08:25,195 --> 00:08:27,500 I mean is this not a date? 164 00:08:27,525 --> 00:08:29,291 I don't-I don't know. 165 00:08:29,298 --> 00:08:31,980 So, what? You actually like this guy now? 166 00:08:31,986 --> 00:08:33,572 I don't know. 167 00:08:33,578 --> 00:08:34,752 Are you gonna hook up with him? 168 00:08:34,758 --> 00:08:35,722 I don't know. 169 00:08:35,726 --> 00:08:37,843 - Yes, you do. - No, Ted, I don't. 170 00:08:37,847 --> 00:08:39,853 And you know what? That's okay. 171 00:08:39,866 --> 00:08:42,813 I don't plan out every second of my life like you do. 172 00:08:42,815 --> 00:08:46,372 - I don't plan out every... - Oh, really? What is all of this? 173 00:08:46,377 --> 00:08:50,162 I mean, why can't you just say, "Hey, Robin, let's go get some sushi?" 174 00:08:50,167 --> 00:08:55,143 No, it has to be a-a string quartet and-and Paris and flowers and chocolates 175 00:08:55,148 --> 00:08:57,871 and let's spend the rest of our lives together. 176 00:08:57,877 --> 00:09:00,732 Don't you think we're a little bit past sushi at this point? 177 00:09:00,735 --> 00:09:03,930 God, you are so terrified of anything real. 178 00:09:03,937 --> 00:09:05,873 It's like you're floating out in space. 179 00:09:05,875 --> 00:09:07,852 Touch the ground, Robin. 180 00:09:07,857 --> 00:09:10,821 Live in the world, make a mistake. Make this mistake. 181 00:09:10,826 --> 00:09:12,803 I need to think about this. 182 00:09:12,808 --> 00:09:14,130 Fine. 183 00:09:14,305 --> 00:09:16,323 No, I'm sorry, I... 184 00:09:16,698 --> 00:09:18,171 I can't do this anymore. 185 00:09:18,177 --> 00:09:19,840 I need an answer. 186 00:09:21,147 --> 00:09:25,413 If you want me to say yes right now, I-I can't do that. 187 00:09:25,418 --> 00:09:29,383 Well, if it's not yes, then it's a no. 188 00:09:31,158 --> 00:09:33,492 Then I guess it's not meant to be. 189 00:09:37,295 --> 00:09:38,693 Nice try, buddy. 190 00:09:38,698 --> 00:09:40,841 Good hustle out there. 191 00:09:41,368 --> 00:09:44,013 Look at the bright side. At least you got some closure. 192 00:09:44,018 --> 00:09:47,092 She's made her choice and you can finally move on. 193 00:09:47,987 --> 00:09:49,881 Screw that. This ain't over. 194 00:09:50,186 --> 00:09:53,452 Ted, you sat here in this very booth and you said... 195 00:09:53,457 --> 00:09:55,513 I don't care what I said. 196 00:09:55,515 --> 00:09:58,422 This is gonna happen. She can't say it's not meant to be. 197 00:09:58,425 --> 00:10:00,420 It is meant to be, and you know why? 198 00:10:00,427 --> 00:10:02,650 'Cause I mean it to be. 199 00:10:06,325 --> 00:10:07,910 - Unpause? - Unpause. 200 00:10:07,915 --> 00:10:09,531 Let's pause. 201 00:10:09,585 --> 00:10:13,081 See, Marshall and Lily had a rule that at any point during a fight 202 00:10:13,088 --> 00:10:14,842 they could pause and take a break. 203 00:10:14,848 --> 00:10:17,072 Their fights often lasted for days. 204 00:10:17,075 --> 00:10:19,291 - A painting fellowship? - I was never going to take it. 205 00:10:19,305 --> 00:10:22,143 - In California? - I was never going to take it. 206 00:10:22,146 --> 00:10:25,102 Ted, she is going on that camping trip. 207 00:10:25,107 --> 00:10:30,380 Dude, barring some act of God, Robin's gonna be with Sandy this weekend. 208 00:10:31,258 --> 00:10:32,572 Fine. 209 00:10:32,808 --> 00:10:35,443 If an act of God is what it takes, 210 00:10:35,447 --> 00:10:37,683 then an act of God it is. 211 00:10:38,247 --> 00:10:40,553 What are you talking about? 212 00:10:42,038 --> 00:10:44,142 I'm gonna make it rain. 213 00:10:48,757 --> 00:10:51,031 I can't let Robin go camping with this guy. 214 00:10:51,035 --> 00:10:52,531 So how do I keep that from happening? 215 00:10:52,535 --> 00:10:54,973 Simple-- I make it rain! 216 00:10:54,975 --> 00:10:56,973 Ted, do you want me to slap you again? 217 00:10:56,976 --> 00:10:59,103 'Cause I kind of enjoyed it the first time. 218 00:10:59,107 --> 00:11:00,991 Look, I-I might be crazy right now... No, you know what? 219 00:11:00,995 --> 00:11:03,741 I am definitely crazy right now, but I have a plan. 220 00:11:03,746 --> 00:11:05,513 That girl you used to go out with, Penelope, 221 00:11:05,527 --> 00:11:08,061 wasn't she getting her PhD in Native American culture? 222 00:11:08,066 --> 00:11:08,822 Yeah. 223 00:11:08,826 --> 00:11:09,931 Are you still in touch with her? 224 00:11:09,937 --> 00:11:12,152 Sure. I mean, even though we stopped having sex, 225 00:11:12,157 --> 00:11:14,571 we still get together, like, once a month to chat and catch up, 226 00:11:14,575 --> 00:11:16,373 and of course I'm not in touch with her! 227 00:11:16,378 --> 00:11:18,572 Well, you're gonna need to get in touch with her. 228 00:11:18,578 --> 00:11:21,392 She's gonna teach me how to do a rain dance. 229 00:11:22,297 --> 00:11:25,571 - Did you just say a "rain dance"? - Yes. 230 00:11:25,856 --> 00:11:28,201 - A rain dance. - Yes. 231 00:11:28,206 --> 00:11:31,982 - A dance to make it rain. - Yes. 232 00:11:39,127 --> 00:11:41,073 - We're finding Penelope! - No, we are not! 233 00:11:41,078 --> 00:11:42,032 Yes, we are! 234 00:11:42,037 --> 00:11:46,581 Ted, you're forcing me to be the voice of reason, and it's not a good look for me! 235 00:11:47,345 --> 00:11:49,423 Why the hell should I help you? 236 00:11:49,427 --> 00:11:54,741 Come on, I know it didn't work out between us, but we did... have a relationship. 237 00:11:54,745 --> 00:11:58,023 We had sex twice in your car, and then you dumped me. 238 00:11:58,038 --> 00:12:00,453 How is that a relationship? 239 00:12:00,457 --> 00:12:01,951 Twice! 240 00:12:02,308 --> 00:12:05,170 - Barney, there is no way... - Shh! 241 00:12:05,176 --> 00:12:07,160 Seriously, come on. 242 00:12:08,217 --> 00:12:11,393 Penelope, I really need to make it rain this weekend. 243 00:12:11,396 --> 00:12:12,770 Why? 244 00:12:12,936 --> 00:12:14,560 There's this girl... 245 00:12:14,565 --> 00:12:16,323 "There's this girl." 246 00:12:16,328 --> 00:12:20,393 You know, the traditional rain dance is a sacred prayer to nature. 247 00:12:20,395 --> 00:12:25,473 I don't think the Great Spirit looks too kindly on white dudes who co-opt it to get laid. 248 00:12:25,476 --> 00:12:27,102 Penelope, this is the girl I love. 249 00:12:27,106 --> 00:12:30,273 If it doesn't rain this weekend, she's gonna end up with the wrong guy. 250 00:12:30,276 --> 00:12:31,802 Please. 251 00:12:33,516 --> 00:12:36,740 This wrong guy, is he a huge jackass? 252 00:12:36,746 --> 00:12:37,722 Absolutely. 253 00:12:37,726 --> 00:12:39,181 - Kind of like Barney? - Kind of. 254 00:12:39,197 --> 00:12:40,951 - Hey. - You hit on my mom! 255 00:12:40,957 --> 00:12:42,803 We weren't exclusive! 256 00:12:44,775 --> 00:12:45,963 I'm in. 257 00:12:45,967 --> 00:12:48,803 And so the three of us headed up to the roof of my building. 258 00:12:48,806 --> 00:12:49,973 Okay. 259 00:12:50,308 --> 00:12:52,571 Crouch down and bend over a little bit. 260 00:12:52,577 --> 00:12:55,610 Wow, it took five shots of tequila to get you in that position. 261 00:12:55,786 --> 00:12:58,482 I will throw you off this roof. 262 00:12:58,486 --> 00:13:00,610 There's so much of your mom in you. 263 00:13:03,807 --> 00:13:06,041 And she's been throwing up ever since. 264 00:13:06,045 --> 00:13:08,683 So how'd she manage to eat so much chocolate? 265 00:13:08,885 --> 00:13:12,250 Remember that guy, Ted, that I was telling you about? 266 00:13:12,267 --> 00:13:15,183 Well, I came home and I found him waiting in my apartment 267 00:13:15,185 --> 00:13:17,670 with a string quartet and roses and chocolates... 268 00:13:17,688 --> 00:13:20,540 Oh, that's so sweet. 269 00:13:20,556 --> 00:13:24,600 Okay, yes, it's sweet in theory, but isn't it also kind of crazy? 270 00:13:24,616 --> 00:13:28,811 I mean, a string quartet in my living room-- who does that? 271 00:13:28,817 --> 00:13:30,113 Nobody does that. 272 00:13:30,117 --> 00:13:31,262 Exactly. 273 00:13:31,267 --> 00:13:34,410 No, honey-- nobody does that. 274 00:13:35,727 --> 00:13:38,521 But I guess I'm just a hopeless romantic. 275 00:13:38,526 --> 00:13:41,121 I'm gonna put my hand up your dog now. 276 00:13:43,288 --> 00:13:46,053 So you're saying you would forbid me from going? 277 00:13:46,055 --> 00:13:47,833 Forbid? Who said forbid? 278 00:13:47,837 --> 00:13:50,983 I was just reminding you that there's this wedding coming up in a couple of months, 279 00:13:50,986 --> 00:13:52,872 and I was kind of hoping you'd save the day. 280 00:13:52,876 --> 00:13:55,530 Look for me-- I'll be the guy in the awesome suit. 281 00:13:55,545 --> 00:13:58,241 Come on, Lily. It's what you've always wanted. 282 00:13:58,245 --> 00:14:03,092 Yeah, but there's a lot of things I've always wanted, and I haven't done any of them. 283 00:14:03,656 --> 00:14:08,600 I'm sorry. I just need to do this before settling down forever. 284 00:14:08,605 --> 00:14:12,401 So now we've gone from "I was never gonna do it" to "I need to do this"? 285 00:14:12,407 --> 00:14:14,450 Did I leave the room at some point? When did that happen? 286 00:14:14,456 --> 00:14:16,350 Oh, maybe when you said you wouldn't let me do it. 287 00:14:16,356 --> 00:14:18,332 I never said that! 288 00:14:18,336 --> 00:14:19,962 You know, if you're having these kind of doubts now, 289 00:14:19,968 --> 00:14:21,431 what's gonna change in three months? 290 00:14:21,437 --> 00:14:22,741 Maybe we just shouldn't get married at all. 291 00:14:22,756 --> 00:14:24,152 Maybe not. 292 00:14:26,638 --> 00:14:28,130 - Pause. - Pause. 293 00:14:28,775 --> 00:14:31,523 - So, are you just, like, starving? - Totally. 294 00:14:31,525 --> 00:14:32,860 Red Lobster? 295 00:14:33,565 --> 00:14:37,122 Oh, lobster, lobster, lobster, you are delicious! 296 00:14:37,126 --> 00:14:40,661 Oh, God, I love butter sauce! There's nothing bad about it. 297 00:14:40,668 --> 00:14:43,141 Say something bad about butter sauce, I dare you. 298 00:14:43,148 --> 00:14:44,922 I wouldn't dare. 299 00:14:45,307 --> 00:14:48,380 Marshall, no. We're on pause. 300 00:14:48,386 --> 00:14:50,830 There's no crying in Pauseland! 301 00:14:50,837 --> 00:14:53,041 Pauseland is a magical place, with-- 302 00:14:53,048 --> 00:14:56,741 with popcorn shrimp mountains and butter sauce rivers! 303 00:14:57,665 --> 00:14:59,093 Damn it! 304 00:14:59,175 --> 00:15:01,641 Happy, happy, happy, happy, happy, happy birthday, 305 00:15:01,698 --> 00:15:04,170 happy, happy, happy, happy, appy, happy birthday, 306 00:15:04,176 --> 00:15:05,402 happy, happy... 307 00:15:14,018 --> 00:15:15,652 Ted, this is funny. 308 00:15:16,265 --> 00:15:17,720 Still funny. 309 00:15:18,355 --> 00:15:21,720 Still fu... And now it's sad. 310 00:15:22,336 --> 00:15:25,340 Hey, Penelope, you sure I'm doing this right? 311 00:15:25,348 --> 00:15:26,633 I think so. 312 00:15:27,165 --> 00:15:30,461 Does it, uh, look anything like a real rain dance? 313 00:15:30,466 --> 00:15:32,100 I think so. 314 00:15:32,406 --> 00:15:37,762 Hey, Penelope, have you, uh, have you ever actually seen a rain dance performed? 315 00:15:38,177 --> 00:15:39,362 No. 316 00:15:41,277 --> 00:15:42,171 No? 317 00:15:42,177 --> 00:15:43,770 I've read extensively on the subject: 318 00:15:43,776 --> 00:15:46,542 firsthand accounts, theoretical criticism, the anthropological... 319 00:15:46,547 --> 00:15:49,851 Have you ever seen a rain dance? 320 00:15:50,045 --> 00:15:52,371 I've seen a film strip. 321 00:15:52,375 --> 00:15:54,083 Terrific. Uh, look, I should run. 322 00:15:54,087 --> 00:15:57,730 I'm getting brain surgery from some guy who's seen a couple episodes of E.R. 323 00:15:57,737 --> 00:15:59,341 I can't believe this. 324 00:15:59,347 --> 00:16:02,461 We've been up here for the past hour making complete asses of ourselves. 325 00:16:02,468 --> 00:16:04,782 What do you mean "we," white man? 326 00:16:08,205 --> 00:16:10,301 How did we get here? 327 00:16:10,935 --> 00:16:13,323 Couple of days ago, the biggest problem in my life was, 328 00:16:13,336 --> 00:16:16,672 did Ted eat the last pudding snack pack in the fridge. 329 00:16:16,678 --> 00:16:18,593 I think there's still one left. 330 00:16:18,736 --> 00:16:20,222 Dibs. 331 00:16:23,707 --> 00:16:26,361 - Unpause? - Unpause. 332 00:16:27,185 --> 00:16:30,511 Look... I know this sucks. 333 00:16:30,517 --> 00:16:33,221 It's just something I'm going through. 334 00:16:33,226 --> 00:16:35,763 I'm not asking you to understand it. 335 00:16:35,766 --> 00:16:38,211 I'm not asking you to be happy about it. 336 00:16:38,687 --> 00:16:41,271 I'm just asking you to support it. 337 00:16:43,495 --> 00:16:45,941 I want to, Lily, okay? 338 00:16:45,976 --> 00:16:47,782 I really do. 339 00:16:47,846 --> 00:16:49,841 But I just can't. 340 00:16:49,846 --> 00:16:50,530 Why not? 341 00:16:50,537 --> 00:16:53,463 Because you're scaring the hell out of me, that's why not. 342 00:16:53,688 --> 00:16:55,582 What if you decide to go be a painter 343 00:16:55,586 --> 00:16:57,682 and then you realize I don't fit in to your life anymore, 344 00:16:57,688 --> 00:16:59,891 and three months becomes forever? 345 00:16:59,906 --> 00:17:02,571 Can you promise me that that's not gonna happen? 346 00:17:02,988 --> 00:17:03,921 Marshall... 347 00:17:03,925 --> 00:17:06,081 'Cause if you can't promise me that, we shoul just break up right now. 348 00:17:06,086 --> 00:17:09,342 I'm not gonna wait around for three months just to have my heart ripped out. 349 00:17:11,738 --> 00:17:13,880 Marshall, I love you. 350 00:17:14,956 --> 00:17:17,642 Can you promise me that that's not gonna happen? 351 00:17:17,645 --> 00:17:19,901 - Pause. - No, Lily, we cannot pause this anymore. 352 00:17:19,908 --> 00:17:21,731 Can you promise me that that's not gonna happen?! 353 00:17:21,738 --> 00:17:23,760 - Pause! - Why do you want me to pause?! 354 00:17:27,068 --> 00:17:29,433 That's just a great use of the pause function, baby. 355 00:17:29,436 --> 00:17:30,630 Thank you. 356 00:17:36,826 --> 00:17:38,491 Hey, Ted. 357 00:17:38,495 --> 00:17:40,310 Whatcha doing? 358 00:17:40,317 --> 00:17:41,973 A rain dance. 359 00:17:41,985 --> 00:17:46,751 Dude, that's not a rain dance, that's a fat kid with a bee in his pants. 360 00:17:46,758 --> 00:17:50,090 Look, I highly doubt the Great Spirit is a stickler for choreography. 361 00:17:50,096 --> 00:17:51,953 It's the thought that counts. 362 00:17:51,998 --> 00:17:54,741 She's leaving in half an hour. 363 00:17:56,755 --> 00:18:00,413 These are your awesome years. You're wasting them on this girl. 364 00:18:00,417 --> 00:18:01,790 This isn't gonna work! 365 00:18:01,795 --> 00:18:03,510 Yeah. I know that. 366 00:18:03,517 --> 00:18:06,613 - Well, then why are you doing this? - Because I love her. 367 00:18:06,615 --> 00:18:07,980 I love her! 368 00:18:07,988 --> 00:18:09,542 I told her that the first night we went out, 369 00:18:09,546 --> 00:18:12,592 and here it is, eight months later, and nothing's changed. 370 00:18:12,597 --> 00:18:15,661 So yes, I know this isn't gonna work. 371 00:18:15,665 --> 00:18:17,700 But it has to work! 372 00:18:17,995 --> 00:18:20,060 You hear me, universe? 373 00:18:20,068 --> 00:18:22,812 This is Ted Mosby talking! 374 00:18:22,816 --> 00:18:24,910 Give me some rain! 375 00:18:25,785 --> 00:18:27,361 Come on! 376 00:18:28,295 --> 00:18:30,151 Come on! 377 00:18:30,657 --> 00:18:32,943 Come on...! 378 00:18:36,237 --> 00:18:38,603 Oh, come on! 379 00:18:51,198 --> 00:18:54,233 Pushing the front back into the Tri-State area 380 00:18:54,236 --> 00:18:58,380 and giving Manhattan one of its worst storms in over a decade. 381 00:18:58,387 --> 00:19:00,973 How about that? He did it. 382 00:19:21,945 --> 00:19:24,812 Robin! Hey, Robin! 383 00:19:31,055 --> 00:19:32,963 Oh, thank God you're here! 384 00:19:32,966 --> 00:19:35,151 My camping trip got rained out. 385 00:19:35,166 --> 00:19:36,960 I know. I'm sorry. 386 00:19:36,965 --> 00:19:39,800 - It's not your fault. - Yeah, it is. 387 00:19:39,806 --> 00:19:41,081 Come down here. 388 00:19:41,087 --> 00:19:43,232 It's pouring. You come up. 389 00:19:43,238 --> 00:19:45,412 No, you have to come down here. 390 00:19:45,997 --> 00:19:47,931 - Why? - Why? 391 00:19:47,936 --> 00:19:51,163 Because I made it rain, that's what I did today! 392 00:19:51,176 --> 00:19:55,582 And that's enough. I-I've done my part. Now, get down here! 393 00:19:55,657 --> 00:19:58,641 I'm not dressed, Ted. No. Come up. 394 00:19:58,646 --> 00:20:01,100 I'm not coming up there, Robin, I'm not. 395 00:20:01,107 --> 00:20:03,661 You have to come down here! 396 00:20:22,287 --> 00:20:24,441 - I was gonna... - I know. 397 00:20:43,147 --> 00:20:45,900 And that's how Robin and I ended up together. 398 00:20:45,908 --> 00:20:48,960 Turns out, all I had to do was make it rain. 399 00:20:49,096 --> 00:20:52,192 As I rode home the next morning, the city looked the same, 400 00:20:52,195 --> 00:20:55,220 the people looked the same. It all looked the same. 401 00:20:55,226 --> 00:20:56,742 But it wasn't. 402 00:20:56,746 --> 00:21:00,320 In just one night, everything had changed.